Legacy Issues with Zeluleko Zet Moyo
ON our last article, “Finding My Space in the 4.0 Industrial Generation”, an exuberated reader asked an interesting question after indulging with the article. The question was, “how can one develop EQ or is it an inherent skill that one is born with?” I then saw it prudent that on this article we answer that question and by so doing explicate how one can develop EQ.
Is it an inherent skill that only the few chosen can attain? One might inquire. When I took the EQ test online for the first time, I scored 85%, which according to the tool was a good mark. The main four facets that the tool covered include (self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and social management) which are skills that I had as far as I can remember.
Furthermore I did a little research within my family and discovered that most of them exhibited these skills. With this information only, one can rush to conclude that EQ is inherent when the true understanding should be that, one can be born with exceptionality in exhibiting those skills and another born without any tincture of any of the skills.
The one who has no trace of these skills can develop them because they are skills that means they can be developed and one that is born with some trace of them also can develop them to become exceptional, so both the two need to develop their EQ! . Let me dive straight into it and help you develop your EQ and help you unconsciously set yourself up with high performance.
Let’s look at a few ways that one can employ to develop their EQ:
Construe Yourself
From our last article we defined EQ as, the ability to master and manage both your emotions and those of the people around you, in response to different life circumstances. The first point of call if one is to develop their EQ and be able to achieve the definition we just submitted earlier they need to be able to master themselves or their emotion. You cannot be able to master other people’s emotions if you failing to master your emotions and manage them. Here are a few points on how you can build this foundation of self-emotional mastery and management:
Acknowledge and analyze your emotions
Many at times we have a tendency of ignoring our emotions especially if we perceive them as negative or with a potential of giving us a negative outcome. In our lives whenever we encounter a situation the first sudden, unconscious, involuntary response that our bodies unleash is an emotion and that emotion is a response to a certain trigger that defines what is happening within the system called your body. For instance, you in an end of year staff party and you receive a message informing you that your mother has passed away; the involuntary response will be a sudden emotional change from happy to sad within seconds. That sudden change of emotion is reporting to you the change within your system and it is an alarm that calls for you to apply and appropriate or rather necessary action towards the signal sent. For you to have high EQ you need to learn to acknowledge your emotions and quickly analyze them. By analyzing I mean think soberly about the emotion right from the root cause of it, why am I feeling this way, is it the right feeling for the setting am in and how do I act on it. When you have clearly analyzed them then manage them. The best way to manage them is to think of your chosen action response and the consequences of it presently and on the long run.
Own your emotions!
Be authentic
Be true to yourself and to your emotions. Everyone knows their character weak point and the triggers of those characters. The intelligent thing to do is to be true with yourself and know which environments or conversations you should avoid because they trigger negative emotions within you. If you authentic enough and even your team know about it, it is easy for them to protect you from such environments that trigger negative emotions within you.
Be real with your emotions!
Construe your society
The second part to EQ development is being able to master and manage the emotions of other people. To be able to do that you should:
Consider the wavelet effect
For every action there is a reaction, so they say. Before you act on your emotions think about the impact your action or words will have on the immediate victim and those around them. Say you are the CEO of a tourism company and one of your frequent clients files a complaint about the bad service they got from one of your shift managers. The projected or suspected emotion will be anger and frustration, but the magic is in how you express it to your shift manager. For example, say you decide to confront him when he is addressing his shift workers in their common room, you interrupt him as he is still addressing, you shout at him, you even tell him how useless he is and how bad his public relations skills are. The truth is it will not build him in anyway rather it might destroy him if he is not emotionally intelligent and the effects might be seen as far as the last person working under him.
Be a relationship agent
Let creating relationships and managing them be your master goal. Create a professional and friendly relationship with your team so much such that they can come to you when they have problems. Remember the problems and stresses that your team encounter might not be your problems and stresses but they affect your business and profits therefore they are also your problems. Invest in knowing your people on personal levels so that you pick up hidden emotions that might disturb their performance at work. Be always sensitive as to what you say, when you say it and how you say it as that can either make or break a person on a good day. In simpler terms a good business leader is the one who is a perfect analyser of characters and behaviors, one who is excellent in predicting toxic behavior within his team members and be able to counter it.
With these few concepts put to action, one is able to develop their EQ and be automatically set with high performance. Let me give you a few states about EQ according to surveys done mainly by Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves:
* It accounts for 58% performance in all types of jobs
* It is the single biggest predictor of success in a work place
* 90% of high performers have high EQ
* 20% of low performers have high EQ
* It is the foundation for all critical skills
* Strongest driver of leadership & personal excellence
* Directly linked with high returns
Zeluleko Zet Moyo is a transformational speaker, leadership developer and author. He can be contacted on: +263 776089376, Azmoyo@gmail.com
